& in the shadows
2005-07-12, 7:30 a.m.

I wonder what you're thinking in all of this seperated silence.

I miss ... well, perhaps it's no longer needed to express the apparent.
Words seem to fail me more and more these days.

All I do when I'm alone is sit and think and write everything away inside of my head, and lose it all to crushed emotions at the end of the day.

I suppose I'd hurt twice as much if I knew thoughts had been congregating inside of you about our sudden distance.
Should I be surprised? Of course not.

I don't blame you for you wanting and needing your space and time away from me.

Perhaps I need the same from myself.

In the shadows my dependace has become stale, and feels frail at almost any moment any more, where as my fear is slowly beginning to control my every action.

I try not to think about the way things are currently between us, but my mind and heart always lead me back to your door.
Memories, thoughts and words spoken from you will always breathe in my lungs and flow through my blood. You may decide to leave me, I understand everything. You have to do what is best for you.
But for rememberance sake, I will never leave you. And I know that you know that.

I just want you to know that I'm not the slut you think of me.

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